Tweet: Currently ticked all the way off.

If I were Miss America, I wouldn't wish for world peace. I'd wish for clear communication. Worldwide.

Honestly people (myself included)- Just be clear and honest. Until technology develops better mind-readers, your mouth and vocal cords are gonna have to do the job.

A Walking, Talking Question Mark

New knowledge. 

1) Nothing soothes like the hustle.

2) Gap employees deserve to make more money during Friends & Family.

3) I was a smurf in a previous life.

4) Hannah Montana/Miley's songwriters know my soul. 

5) The Provo Library parking lot does not offer comfort. 

6) Noni is a major stalker.

G'night cuz.

Alfred Hitchcock. A man of utter dry wit. This quote from Alfred Hitchcock Presents just slayed me.

"Tonight's discussion is concerned with that thorny problem that all parents face as they survey their children; 'Is coexistence really possible?'"

And from the same discussion, this one concerns the "middle-ager."-- "He can only drive down the dusty road towards civility in a cooled-off hot rod, forever doomed to be a mere spectator in the great drag race of life."

Yeah. Yeeeeah. Anyone who wants to come watch with me is welcome at any time. Thank you and good, hyphen, night.

Preg'd

"Could you tell me how much this would be with the 25% off?"

"Sure thing..."

"(beams at me) ...Are you pregnant?"

".........Nope."

I felt almost bad disappointing her. She was so excited.

However, I have always eaten for two.

Together we're Real Easy

Noni and I both won awards at our Gap meeting tonight. Domination. 2 outta 4 baby.

Just wanted to give you all a heads up from the fashion world: Loose is the new skinny.

Hamburglar

The only thing I've retained from my Psych 111 class Freshman year (besides Pavlov's dog) is the story about the young child who craved salt. When his parents refused to let him eat salt, he died. (Talk about guilt and remorse. My kids can eat whatever they want.)

What's wrong with my body that I constantly crave hamburgers? No, not just hamburgers. Cheeseburgers. BBQ. Western. Quacamole. 2 for 1. Plain with tomato- any kind and every kind. I honestly can't get enough. I even just spent 5 minutes reading some medical article about how "salt is a natural mood-elevating substance" in hopes that I would find some answer to these ridiculous cravings.

I wear black and white everyday too. The similarities are just too much to deny. Hide your ground beef.